"Like one boyfriend I had who told me condoms dissolve in water so I'd have unprotected sex in the shower... "

I'm sorry but that's hilarious.

Lets be clear - as a man - I can tell you that men lie.

Not all of them but at least 95%.

They lie to women and they lie to each other. Sometimes little lies, just exaggerating, just telling the good bits, sometimes massive lies.

I knew a girl who was seeing a doctor for months, he was always very busy, one day she got suspicious – and asked him if he was seeing another woman. He told her plain to her face he would never do that to her and that he loved her and she was the only woman for him. Some months went by and she called his phone and it went to answer phone – now she had the same phone and pressed the factory default to access the answering machine (a bit naughty yes) – from accessing his messages it transpired that he was seeing 3 additional women.

There is a saying “Women can fake an orgasm, but a man can fake a whole relationship”

Hey.

Boy do I have a rather embarrassing admission to make. Although I am a terrible liar and I have never lied to a women to get her into bed (at least not a lie that has worked, I dont know what it is but every time I tell a girl I am a regestered psychologist to get her into bed I end up spending the entire evening listening to her drone on and on about her mother, father, car, work and the small nap she took after lunch, its really not a turn on) I have recently bent the truth to impress a girl. My only saving grace is my friend did the same thing, so he is as guilty as I.

The other week we were climbing a mountain. About half way up we collapsed on the ground, struggling to breathe and wishing for the sweet embrace of death. All of a sudden a very attractive girl walked around the corner. Instead of continuing our pitiful deciline into the netherworlds both of us quickly jumped to our feet, forced ourselves to breathe normally and even sucked in our guts. It was shameful and to make it worse it didn't work. The girl just walked by us with a contemptious glance. Defeated we both slid back to the ground and hoped some large boulder would fall on us.

So even one as perfect as I can occasionally fall from grace and participate in behaviours more suited to the commoners. But at least it wasn't as bad as my other friend (I bet you can guess who) who told this chick he just picked up that he didn't have any condoms just so she would agree to a bit of.... backdoor entertainment.