Both my man and I have experienced bullying, him to a much greater degree than I.
I won't talk about what happened to him, its not my place to tell, and besides I'm writing for girls anyway. If anyone wonders why I always include my experiences if I can, then it isn't out of ego or to try and get sympathy: I just don't expect others to tell me things this personal and not to share myself.
My sisters and neices (from my father's side of the family) emotionally and verbally bullied me progressivly from the time I was 5 till I was 15. Although it hurt me very badly at the time, I think I got off lightly, compared to the things girls at school go through every single day. The text message assaults, ostrication from groups, taunting, name calling, rumours, lies, and so much more. I experienced a lot of this, but it could never go too far because our parents were always near and none of them were willing to be too overt in case they were caught. Most of my sisters were meaner to their daughters than either my sisters or their daughters ever were to me. Which is rather sad.
My mother says now that her biggest regret in life is how my dad's daughters and their daughters treated me. But she never lifted a finger to stop them. According to here it was my fault and I deserved it. The saddest thing is that a lot of teachers and principles in schools feel the smae way! That being bullied is a sign of your weakness or defectivness, or that you somewho throough your actions cause people to bully you. Bullies find people who they are smaller, shorter, quiter or shyer than themselves: they pick an easy target. Bullies don't bully you because of you, they do it to gain power in their own lives where there is none.   
So today I am asking: what has been your experience with girl to girl bullying? Either as the victim, bully or maybe even an onlooker or parent.

Some folk in the sex and relationship advice field think its ok to go off and look at porn, or flirt with someone, or think about what having an affair with someone would be like when you're in a relationship. That its not cheating. I don't think its ok. If you're in a relationship, then you're in it and should take care of it and focus solely on your partner. If the person you're with isn't 'enough' for you, then you shouldn't be sticking around but getting your fix somewhere else. Find someone who is enough, and let the person you're with do the same. I'm going to write a list of what cheating means to me, and I'd love to hear what you think... There's no right or wrong answer to this, so long as you're happy with your relationship. If you honestly don't mind your partner checking out other women etc, and you are letting him do it for your own healthy reasons, then there's no problem. But if you are putting up with something from your man which hurts you and leaves you feeling cheated on; because you are afraid of losing him, because you think you're not good enough, or because he won't change for you, then please please realise that a) none of this is your fault, b) you deserve to feel safe, loved and respected in your relationship, c) if your someone is not willing to cut out an activity that hurts you then he is probably not a safe bet: if you love someone and/or respect them then you do not want to see them hurt. You should mean more than Playboy.

Ok, so here's MY list, which is just that, my list... this is the standard to which my man and I hold ourselves. Every relationship is different. Just remember that you deserve to be treated the way you want to. Please write your own lists, if not here then in private... and give your own feelings a good look over anbd see if your needs for a relationship are being met.

Right.... list:
Pornography
Fantasy involving other people
Checking out other people
Flirting with another person
Thinking about a sexual or an emotional affair with another person
Kissing someone else
Touching someone else in a sexual manner
Having sexual feelings/thoughts about another
Sex with another

Might sound a bit strict, but to be honest, its not that hard to be monogomus with the right person. The thing is finding the right person, and weighing what you get from actions like those above against what you get from your partner.
I hope I have made some kind of sense and haven't made a blithering idiot of myself... lol Anyway, drop me a line or a list, or even a hi....

I'm doing a whole lot of reading for research for my book... which is damaging my uni work somewhat I suppose.lol
Anyway, I got three books out of the library today, one about date rape and abusive relationships, one about rape, and one about sex and relationships, yet none of them actually define any of the terms! Which has angered me somewhat. Every one of the books is up in arms about rape, abuse and sexual assault going unreported. Yet how do girls and women know it has happened to them if they don't understand what it is??? It took over a year for me to admit to myself that I had been sexually assulted. Because I was looking at the situations from the point of view of people like my mother and various others who attest that if you are with a guy somewhere, and don't do something which fits their scale of acceptable resistance, then it is your fault because you a)led him on, b) put yourself in that position and shouldn't be surprised, c) if you really didn't want you would have left or something to that effect. There are plenty of other bad ideas about sexual assaults that stop women from accepting what happened to them as what it truly is, and from reporting it.
What I'm asking today is:
What does rape, sexual assault, and date (or accuaintance) rape mean to YOU??

I had the absolute best sex of my life on friday night. And if your a girl, I'm sure you know what that means...
So I'm asking, for the information of many girls who want to know and are afraid to ask, about the fantastic O word. Yes, I mean orgasm! How, where, why, with what or who... !!! I know its a personal question, but its one you feel like shouting about from a big tower when it happens... lol