I'm trying to write a book for girls and women all about the things (and men) to look out for, their own bodies, and anything else handy for navigating life. The thing is, there isn't one person who has experienced everything... especially not me. So I'm calling out to women (and even dudes willing to give away their species secrets) to answer my burning questions. PLEASE!!!!
I have a toxic friend too which I can't shake off. She's an old friend who I was mates with as a teenager. When I went to uni we kept in touch although we did drift apart as we both evolved as people, get different groups of friends & didn't have much in common anymore. When I moved home after uni we met up now & then to catch up with was more…
I have been trying very hard the last six month or so to get my life in line with the kind of people I want in it. It has been quite an ordeal truly and I haven't found a way to eliminate them completely. But I don't go out with them any longer ignore their request on myspace and facebook and I NEVER call them or forward playful texts to the, in more…
I know one of my ex friends said that she was raped. She said she was pretending to be sleeping just to see how far this person would go. They didn't have sexual intercourse but that person, I think was caressing her. She knew what this person was doing. She told me she didn't say no or anything because she wanted to see how far they would go. She more…
I've been struggling with this just recently. I have a set of friends that up until recently I considered to be very close, and like everyone had their issues, but the fact remained I cared for them & their wellbeing as I would any close friend, and I assumed the same was true.
It was only recently, having announced my engagement that I more…
My friend always try to blame everything on me especially if it was her that did or said it and its hard to ditch her beacause se can be so nice 2 me nd she doesnt do it 2 all my other friends so its really hard for them to no what i mean when i say she is horrible to me so if i ditch her then im gonna be ditching my other friends! more…
lol Nup, no bullets! I asked folk what cheating means to THEM (I'd make it italic, but i have no idea how! lol). Of course your ideas and ideals will be completely different to mine. No two relationships are the same. Its not important for relationships to all have the same components. What is important is that the people in the relationship find a more…
Okay, you will probably shoot me down in a hail of bullets, but...When i was 21 I would have agreed with your list...in fact when I was 31 I would have, but after 24 years together (and going pretty strong) I don't. If you get jealous by fantasies involving others, checking out others etc then you may well be in for a massive shock later on. This more…
Ahhhh.... right. When relitives are involved, it's even harder. Can't you choose your family... unfortunatly xx(
My dad's daughters are all around my mum's age and they strongly objected to mum and dad's marraige. So I copped the flack not only from my 'sisters' but from their kids as well. So much fun lol.
So I probably understand how more…
No need for apologies, honestly. It's a 'big issue' for me too and has been for a while. In fact I blogged a private post about it recently :))
My son gets caught up in it when 'her' two kids decide not to speak to him at school and he's baffled by it ... not having a clue why folk do that kinda thing. He understands more than I realis more…
I understand completely. I broke off a friendship recently with a toxic friend after he blogged something nasty about myself and my fiancee. I had been taking a break from our friendship as I was having trouble dealing with things he had done to me. I would have returned to the friendship had he not insulted my fiancee (one of many many times he ha more…
This is my pet peeve too. I've //almost// gotten rid of them all but, as you say, it's pretty difficult because of the social structure. My son cops it when I try to cut free, and I get bad-mouthed all over town (assumptions, and downright lies) xx more…
I usually find that that's a lot like giving an inch because they will happily take a mile... and all your food. lol But if it works for you, I'm glad... you just may be a stronger person than me... so good on you. :)
Thanks for commenting! more…
Your right, of course. Clothes make the man apparently... Which is a little sad.
Oh, yes, my mini skirt days have blown past me too... which is depressing simply because for very small scraps of fabric they cost a lot! lol
Thanks for the comment :) more…
Hiya Loni,
Just had to comment on this one!
D had an affair with someone at work a couple of years ago. Baby was only 6 weeks old. And it totally knocked me sideways.
When i found out, and we spoke about it, it was purely a sex/flattery thing...no proper emotional feelings to speak of.
I agree with your list totally.....it`s more…
I think you've hit it on the head when you say it's about the happiness of both parties.
I know couples who have jokey "allow" lists of celebs they could sleep with if the situation came up and both are happy with it, I've been there myself.
Look around this blog and many a married person will post photos "look how gorgeou more…
Don't worry, I didn't feel jumped on, it's a debate! :D
My percieved difference between both people and one person being drunk is simply that it greys the line. It is easy to say "simply don't drink" but I can name at least two things, alcoholism and peer pressure, that puts that under the heading "easier to say than do".
Thank you for commenting, especially as a bloke. :) While I understand your definition and think you have a pretty good idea, the one thing I'm not sure about is if you can really rule a line between both people being drunk and one person being drunk. I don't think being drunk is not an excuse. Or that because both parties were intoxicated that it more…
I`m glad you feel okay and that i was able to help in some small way.
P.S i`ve seen the pic of your lovely Nathan...he looks like a lovely man.... bit like my D really...all cute and cuddly and adorable!
See you soon
Sara x more…
My sister in law just had a little baby boy named Josh. So that stirred up all the feelings again. But in a way it has helped me see that I wasn't ready for what they are undertaking... I am glad to see though that its made my grumpy brother a little sweeter. Aparently he is Captain Baby, he has even made a spread sheet for feedings!!!!lol I was so more…
It affected me for a long time after, i`d forgotten how much `til today, and it`s a really strange feeling cos i`m 13 weeks pregnant at the moment!
I remember when my sister had her first baby, not long after what i had done, and that was the hardest thing of all, i really did feel like i`d go to hell or suffer terribly for my actions in late more…
Isn't it hard to watch pregnant women and little bubies in prams and wonder what your baby's smile would have looked like? But I firmly believe that if you can't give a child the life they deserve, you have no right to bring them into the world. We were so new as a couple at the time, we know that we probably wouldn't have stood the test of parenth more…
Dude, there's probably nothing wrong with you at all, especially if you care what women want like you seem to. Girls are sometimes really shy about telling men what they want: sometimes because they are worried about hurting their men's egos, sometimes because they are ashamed of what they want and think their men will ridicule, or reject, them for more…
Hello again.
I know what you mean about people`s opinions, but those people are usually the one`s who have never had to make a serious decision in their lives.
I must admit that i did think twice about commenting here, or whether i should send you a p.m....as people still make me feel guilty for what i did all those years ago!
Bu more…
Thank you so much Sara. It means a lot to me that you would share your experience with me. Peoples opinions have increasingly made me feel lonlier and guiltier, so you have no idea how much your comment helped me today. I feel exactly the same as you do. I know we didn't have the maturity or stability to be parents, and I know that when we have chi more…
Hello. Hope you don`t mind me commenting here....
I have been in exactly the same situation as you, when i was nineteen. I am now 35, am still with the same man as i was back then, we now have three chidren together, got married last year and are now expecting our fourth child.
Yes, it was the hardest decision we ever made. Do i regret more…
Recent comments (30)
In response to: "How Do You Deal With Toxic Friends???" 170 days old
by Cat [Visitor]
I have a toxic friend too which I can't shake off. She's an old friend who I was mates with as a teenager. When I went to uni we kept in touch although we did drift apart as we both evolved as people, get different groups of friends & didn't have much in common anymore. When I moved home after uni we met up now & then to catch up with was more…
In response to: "How Do You Deal With Toxic Friends???" 223 days old
by Darla [Visitor]
I have been trying very hard the last six month or so to get my life in line with the kind of people I want in it. It has been quite an ordeal truly and I haven't found a way to eliminate them completely. But I don't go out with them any longer ignore their request on myspace and facebook and I NEVER call them or forward playful texts to the, in more…
In response to: "What Does Rape Mean To YOU???" 285 days old
by teke [Visitor]
I know one of my ex friends said that she was raped. She said she was pretending to be sleeping just to see how far this person would go. They didn't have sexual intercourse but that person, I think was caressing her. She knew what this person was doing. She told me she didn't say no or anything because she wanted to see how far they would go. She more…
In response to: "How Do You Deal With Toxic Friends???" 421 days old
by leslie [Visitor]
I've been struggling with this just recently. I have a set of friends that up until recently I considered to be very close, and like everyone had their issues, but the fact remained I cared for them & their wellbeing as I would any close friend, and I assumed the same was true.
It was only recently, having announced my engagement that I more…
In response to: "How Do You Deal With Toxic Friends???" 459 days old
by Georgia [Visitor]
My friend always try to blame everything on me especially if it was her that did or said it and its hard to ditch her beacause se can be so nice 2 me nd she doesnt do it 2 all my other friends so its really hard for them to no what i mean when i say she is horrible to me so if i ditch her then im gonna be ditching my other friends! more…
In response to: "The Naked Truth? " 796 days old
by nordiskgud [Member]
nudity is fine within the parameters of your own home, also i think most people would agree that only the young look great nude! ;) more…
In response to: "What Does Cheating Mean To YOU???" 867 days old
by sugarburn [Member]
lol Nup, no bullets! I asked folk what cheating means to THEM (I'd make it italic, but i have no idea how! lol). Of course your ideas and ideals will be completely different to mine. No two relationships are the same. Its not important for relationships to all have the same components. What is important is that the people in the relationship find a more…
In response to: "What Does Cheating Mean To YOU???" 868 days old
by sexymf Pro
Okay, you will probably shoot me down in a hail of bullets, but...When i was 21 I would have agreed with your list...in fact when I was 31 I would have, but after 24 years together (and going pretty strong) I don't. If you get jealous by fantasies involving others, checking out others etc then you may well be in for a massive shock later on. This more…
In response to: "How Do You Deal With Toxic Friends???" 872 days old
by sugarburn [Member]
Ahhhh.... right. When relitives are involved, it's even harder. Can't you choose your family... unfortunatly xx(
My dad's daughters are all around my mum's age and they strongly objected to mum and dad's marraige. So I copped the flack not only from my 'sisters' but from their kids as well. So much fun lol.
So I probably understand how more…
In response to: "How Do You Deal With Toxic Friends???" 873 days old
by subville [Member]
No need for apologies, honestly. It's a 'big issue' for me too and has been for a while. In fact I blogged a private post about it recently :))
My son gets caught up in it when 'her' two kids decide not to speak to him at school and he's baffled by it ... not having a clue why folk do that kinda thing. He understands more than I realis more…
In response to: "How Do You Deal With Toxic Friends???" 873 days old
by sugarburn [Member]
I understand completely. I broke off a friendship recently with a toxic friend after he blogged something nasty about myself and my fiancee. I had been taking a break from our friendship as I was having trouble dealing with things he had done to me. I would have returned to the friendship had he not insulted my fiancee (one of many many times he ha more…
In response to: "How Do You Deal With Toxic Friends???" 873 days old
by subville [Member]
This is my pet peeve too. I've //almost// gotten rid of them all but, as you say, it's pretty difficult because of the social structure. My son cops it when I try to cut free, and I get bad-mouthed all over town (assumptions, and downright lies) xx more…
In response to: "How Do You Deal With Toxic Friends???" 880 days old
by sugarburn [Member]
I usually find that that's a lot like giving an inch because they will happily take a mile... and all your food. lol But if it works for you, I'm glad... you just may be a stronger person than me... so good on you. :)
Thanks for commenting! more…
In response to: "How Do You Deal With Toxic Friends???" 881 days old
by The_Walrus Pro
Be nicer to them than they deserve. That usually does it. more…
In response to: "How Do You Deal With Toxic Friends???" 881 days old
by deleted user [Visitor]
This is how I deal with them. I detox and move on. more…
In response to: "The Naked Truth? " 887 days old
by sugarburn [Member]
Your right, of course. Clothes make the man apparently... Which is a little sad.
Oh, yes, my mini skirt days have blown past me too... which is depressing simply because for very small scraps of fabric they cost a lot! lol
Thanks for the comment :) more…
In response to: "The Naked Truth? " 887 days old
by loiswakeman [Member]
I guess that clothes are the equivalent of plumage for birds and we feel less attractive without them?
I usually keep myself covered up outside the house, out of respect for the comfort of others! Shorts and miniskirts are a distant memory... more…
In response to: "What Does Cheating Mean To YOU???" 937 days old
by deleted user [Visitor]
Hiya Loni,
Just had to comment on this one!
D had an affair with someone at work a couple of years ago. Baby was only 6 weeks old. And it totally knocked me sideways.
When i found out, and we spoke about it, it was purely a sex/flattery thing...no proper emotional feelings to speak of.
I agree with your list totally.....it`s more…
In response to: "What Does Cheating Mean To YOU???" 937 days old
by ajnspencer Pro
I think you've hit it on the head when you say it's about the happiness of both parties.
I know couples who have jokey "allow" lists of celebs they could sleep with if the situation came up and both are happy with it, I've been there myself.
Look around this blog and many a married person will post photos "look how gorgeou more…
In response to: "What Does Rape Mean To YOU???" 937 days old
by ajnspencer Pro
Don't worry, I didn't feel jumped on, it's a debate! :D
My percieved difference between both people and one person being drunk is simply that it greys the line. It is easy to say "simply don't drink" but I can name at least two things, alcoholism and peer pressure, that puts that under the heading "easier to say than do".
more…
In response to: "What Does Rape Mean To YOU???" 937 days old
by sugarburn [Member]
Thank you for commenting, especially as a bloke. :) While I understand your definition and think you have a pretty good idea, the one thing I'm not sure about is if you can really rule a line between both people being drunk and one person being drunk. I don't think being drunk is not an excuse. Or that because both parties were intoxicated that it more…
In response to: "What Does Rape Mean To YOU???" 938 days old
by ajnspencer Pro
Hmm, if I can comment as a bloke? :D
To me it's any time where it's something one person doesn't want to do sexually and the other person //knows// this.
It gets a lot more blurry round the edges if both participants are drunk or on drugs, not I say BOTH.
If a sober bloke takes advantage of a drunk or drugged more…
In response to: "The Hardest Decision You Will Ever Make" 951 days old
by deleted user [Visitor]
I`m glad you feel okay and that i was able to help in some small way.
P.S i`ve seen the pic of your lovely Nathan...he looks like a lovely man.... bit like my D really...all cute and cuddly and adorable!
See you soon
Sara x
more…
In response to: "The Hardest Decision You Will Ever Make" 951 days old
by sugarburn [Member]
My sister in law just had a little baby boy named Josh. So that stirred up all the feelings again. But in a way it has helped me see that I wasn't ready for what they are undertaking... I am glad to see though that its made my grumpy brother a little sweeter. Aparently he is Captain Baby, he has even made a spread sheet for feedings!!!!lol I was so more…
In response to: "The Hardest Decision You Will Ever Make" 951 days old
by deleted user [Visitor]
It affected me for a long time after, i`d forgotten how much `til today, and it`s a really strange feeling cos i`m 13 weeks pregnant at the moment!
I remember when my sister had her first baby, not long after what i had done, and that was the hardest thing of all, i really did feel like i`d go to hell or suffer terribly for my actions in late more…
In response to: "The Hardest Decision You Will Ever Make" 952 days old
by sugarburn [Member]
Isn't it hard to watch pregnant women and little bubies in prams and wonder what your baby's smile would have looked like? But I firmly believe that if you can't give a child the life they deserve, you have no right to bring them into the world. We were so new as a couple at the time, we know that we probably wouldn't have stood the test of parenth more…
In response to: "A Touchy Subject... A Loud, Happy, Writhing Subject" 952 days old
by sugarburn [Member]
Dude, there's probably nothing wrong with you at all, especially if you care what women want like you seem to. Girls are sometimes really shy about telling men what they want: sometimes because they are worried about hurting their men's egos, sometimes because they are ashamed of what they want and think their men will ridicule, or reject, them for more…
In response to: "The Hardest Decision You Will Ever Make" 952 days old
by deleted user [Visitor]
Hello again.
I know what you mean about people`s opinions, but those people are usually the one`s who have never had to make a serious decision in their lives.
I must admit that i did think twice about commenting here, or whether i should send you a p.m....as people still make me feel guilty for what i did all those years ago!
Bu more…
In response to: "The Hardest Decision You Will Ever Make" 952 days old
by sugarburn [Member]
Thank you so much Sara. It means a lot to me that you would share your experience with me. Peoples opinions have increasingly made me feel lonlier and guiltier, so you have no idea how much your comment helped me today. I feel exactly the same as you do. I know we didn't have the maturity or stability to be parents, and I know that when we have chi more…
In response to: "The Hardest Decision You Will Ever Make" 952 days old
by deleted user [Visitor]
Hello. Hope you don`t mind me commenting here....
I have been in exactly the same situation as you, when i was nineteen. I am now 35, am still with the same man as i was back then, we now have three chidren together, got married last year and are now expecting our fourth child.
Yes, it was the hardest decision we ever made. Do i regret more…